Open the Pod Bay Doors, HAL

Pages

  • A mostly movies blog
  • Fiction

Thursday, July 1, 2010

100 Greatest Movie Insults (btw, your father smelt of elderberries!)



Montage by Harry Hanrahan (via nymag.com).
By Mark Bourne
Tags: struck me funny at the time, viral videos
Newer Post Older Post Home
View mobile version
My photo
Mark Bourne
Open the Pod Bay Doors, HAL is my "mostly movies" blog. It's a work in progress, but then aren't we all?

I'm a Seattle-based writer who enjoys, well, a lot of things: movies, theater, books, astronomy, science fiction, a sense of humor, the lambent amber of firelight through Bowmore Darkest Islay, dogs, the combination of chocolate and orange....

My main site: www.markbourne.com
Email: mark[at]markbourne.com
Twitter: @BourneInSeattle
View my complete profile

Previously on Open the Pod Bay Doors, Hal:

  • ►  2012 (29)
    • ►  March (1)
    • ►  February (14)
    • ►  January (14)
  • ►  2011 (185)
    • ►  December (18)
    • ►  November (16)
    • ►  October (22)
    • ►  September (6)
    • ►  August (16)
    • ►  July (12)
    • ►  June (24)
    • ►  May (24)
    • ►  April (12)
    • ►  March (20)
    • ►  February (11)
    • ►  January (4)
  • ▼  2010 (134)
    • ►  December (8)
    • ►  November (8)
    • ►  October (13)
    • ►  September (9)
    • ►  August (10)
    • ▼  July (15)
      • Louis (2010) — Blow that horn, young Satchmo
      • Bugs Bunny: 70 years old and only one gray hare
      • The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming (...
      • Harlan Ellison: Dreams With Sharp Teeth (2008)
      • Harold Lloyd Compilation
      • My blushes, Watson!
      • Pic picks: Bacall of the wild
      • 35 Movies in 2 Minutes
      • To Kill a Mockingbird (1962) — Another man's skin
      • "Star Wars" Subway Car — Taking the A (for Alderaa...
      • "Yeah, I know, and such small portions"
      • "That sounded a bit treasony me!"
      • Earth vs. The Flying Saucers (1956) — Aliens like Ike
      • 100 Greatest Movie Insults (btw, your father smelt...
      • Pic pick: Best-laid plans
    • ►  June (15)
    • ►  May (14)
    • ►  April (24)
    • ►  March (18)

Popular feature posts

  • Alternate universe movies: "The Maltese Falcon" with Gene Tierney instead of Mary Astor
  • Alternate universe movies: "The Public Enemy" with Louise Brooks instead of Jean Harlow
  • Alternate universe movies: Alfred Hitchcock's "The War of the Worlds"
  • Angels With Dirty Faces (1938) — Whaddya hear, whaddya say?
  • Backbeat (1994) — There are places I remember...
  • Bedazzled (1967) — Giving the devil his due
  • Blazing Saddles (1974) — Excuse me while I whip this out
  • Cat on a Hot Tin Roof (1958) — Mint julips and hot slips
  • Charley Bowers — Breaking a few eggs
  • Eugene O'Neill with a Groucho chaser; or, Hello, I must be blogging
  • Fantastic Voyage (1966) — Navel maneuvers; or, Sailing your inner lava lamp
  • For that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives
  • Forbidden Planet (1956) — such stuff as...
  • Freaks (1932): Sex and the single freak
  • Happy 90th birthday, Ray Bradbury — A bit about Mr. B and me
  • Hoffman (1970) — What fits in the middle
  • Hugo — Dear Martin Scorsese: Thank you for making a movie just for me
  • I Love You, Alice B. Toklas (1968) — Making a hash of it
  • I'm All Right, Jack (1959) — For the benefit of Mr. Kite
  • Junebug (2005) — Family happens
  • Kind Hearts and Coronets (1949) — Murder by numbers, 1, 2 ... 8
  • Notes while watching "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" for the xxth time since childhood
  • Octoberfilms: House of Usher & The Pit and the Pendulum (1960, '61) — Poe-try in motion
  • Octoberfilms: Häxan / Witchcraft Through the Ages — Danish diabolism
  • Octoberfilms: Night of the Demon (1957) — The hell you say
  • Octoberfilms: The Abominable Dr. Phibes & Dr. Phibes Rises Again (1971, '72) — Curses!
  • Octoberfilms: The Haunting (1963) — In the night, in the dark....
  • Octoberfilms: The Innocents (1961) — The screw turns
  • Octoberfilms: The Masque of the Red Death & The Premature Burial (1964, '62)
  • Octoberfilms: The Tomb of Ligeia / An Evening with Edgar Allan Poe (1964, '70)
  • Of lighthouses and foghorns and beasts from evocative fathoms
  • Our Man Flint (1966) and In Like Flint (1967) — double-naught spoofs
  • Petulia (1968) — Uncommon
  • Random thoughts on "Midnight in Paris"
  • Scenes I love: "The Third Man" — a slice of Lime
  • Scenes I love: Charlie Chaplin's science fiction movie (from "Modern Times")
  • Scenes I love: French Cancan (1955) — Renoir, c'est moi‎!
  • Scenes I love: WWBD
  • Shortbus (2006) — Think kink
  • SIFF — 7 films: Detective Dee, Young Goethe, Lovecraft, John Cleese, and more
  • SIFF — Another Earth
  • SIFF — Natural Selection
  • SIFF — Paper Birds (Pájaros de Papel)
  • SIFF — Perfect Sense
  • SIFF — The Names of Love
  • SIFF — The Thief of Bagdad: Re-imagined by Shadoe Stevens with the Music of E.L.O.
  • SIFF — The Trip
  • SIFF — Troll Hunter
  • Some Like It Hot (1959) — The sweet end of the lollipop
  • Stephen Tobolowsky's Birthday Party (2005) — Bing! And many more
  • The Adventures of Baron Munchausen (1989) — Going somewhere on hot air and fantasy
  • The Circus (1928) — Chaplin between the mirrors
  • The Crawling Eye (1958) — Set LASIK blasters on "poke"
  • The Fall (2008) — Paint me a story, Singh me a dream
  • The Iceman Cometh (1960) — Mr. Robards, meet Mr. Lumet, and get that Redford kid in here
  • The Lion in Winter (1968) — We three kings
  • The Man in the White Suit (1951) — One perfectly poured Guinness, please
  • The Party (1968) — Birdie num-nums
  • The President's Analyst (1967) — spy vs. spy, repeat as necessary
  • The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming (1966) — It's a Vlad, Vlad, Vlad, Vlad world
  • The Spirit of the Beehive (1973) — Spanish class
  • The Time Machine (1960) — Taking you where you want to go
  • The Time Machine (2002) — Dishwater: 10, Wells: 0
  • Things to Come (1936) — H.G. Wells explains it all for you
  • Tis the season for Sherlock
  • To Kill a Mockingbird (1962) — Another man's skin
  • Watching "The Artist", feeling the "Vertigo"
  • When Worlds Collide (1951) — Apocalypse Whoa
  • Yankee Doodle Dandy (1942) — It's a grand ol' film
  • Yeah, I know, and such small portions
"Jack Cole's 'Plastic Man' belongs high on any adult's How to Avoid Prozac list, up there with the best of S.J. Perelman, Laurel and Hardy, Damon Runyon, Tex Avery and the Marx Brothers." — Art Spiegelman, The New Yorker

"You know what your problem is? It's that you haven't seen enough movies. All of life's riddles are answered in the movies.” — Steve Martin, Grand Canyon

Movies, film, cinema, the flickers

  • The Mary Sue
    Celebrities are raising money to help those affected by the California wildfires
  • NYT > Movies
    ‘Ad Vitam’ Review: High Stakes and Paragliding
  • Cartoon Brew: Leading the Animation Conversation
    How To Help Animation Industry Workers Who Have Been Displaced By The L.A. Wildfires
  • indieWIRE News
    Cinema Eye Honors 2025 Winners: ‘No Other Land’ Continues Its Remarkable Awards Season Run
  • /Film
    Den Of Thieves 2: Pantera Review: A Triumph Of Dudes Rock Cinema
  • shadowplay
    Blood and Blues
  • The Front Row - Richard Brody | The New Yorker
    The Era of Richard Foreman
  • The Large Association of Movie Blogs (LAMB)
    Lambcast #759 Top Ten Lists -2024
  • CinemaRetro
    WILLIAM FRIEDKIN'S "CRUISING" 4K UHD EDITION COMING FROM ARROW VIDEO
  • A Mythical Monkey writes about the movies
    Your New Year's Resolution: A Movie A Week (Part 7 of 7)
  • Greenbriar Picture Shows
    Parkland Picks with Popcorn #6
  • Bardfilm
    The "10 Classics in 10 Minutes" One-Minute Version of Romeo and Juliet
  • Cinelation
    Favourite First-Watches and Discoveries of 2024
  • David Bordwell: Observations on film art
    Harry Potter and and fabulous making-of tour
  • Sergio Leone and the Infield Fly Rule
    SEAN BAKER'S (AND MIKEY MADISON'S) ANORA
  • impassionedcinema
    Top Film Critics That People are Fond Of
  • Sunset Gun (Kim Morgan)
    Happy Birthday Elliott Gould
  • Some Came Running (Glenn Kenny)
    Summer 2023 Blu-ray/4K Ultra Consumer Guide
  • A bright wall in a dark room
    “Critics of Wes Anderson love to draw attention to his fastidious production design, fetishizing the…
  • By Ken Levine
    Episode 326: The WGA Strike
  • Guardian.co.uk filmblog
    Jean-Luc Godard: a genius who tore up rule book without troubling to read it | Peter Bradshaw
  • Criterion Confessions
    SUNFLOWER - CRITERION CHANNEL
  • Parallax View
    “Breaking new ground has always been in the medium itself” – An Interview With Douglas Trumbull
  • Billy Mernit: Living the Romantic Comedy
    The Hidden Heroine
  • Self-Styled Siren
    National Silent Movie Day: Manhandled (1924)
  • Pullquote (Cinetrix)
    Lurido
  • Sound On Sight
    25 Movies Similar to The Proposal
  • All Good Things
    Final Rd Land Yacht Cars Tourney
  • Roger Ebert
    David Tennant Can’t Hold Together Frustrating Deadwater Fell
  • Duke & The Movies
    Bagaimana Cara Kerja Digital Marketing?
  • Hugo Stiglitz Makes Movies
    The Nun
  • Ferdy on Films
    A Farewell to Ferdy
  • The Marx Brothers Council of Britain
    When Herbert Met Zeppo: A Love Story Involving Chimps, Freaks and Airships
  • Onion A.V. Club
    ComiXology Is Discounting Thousands of Downloadable Comics For Comic-Con
  • Criterion Current
    The Virgin Suicides: “They Hadn’t Heard Us Calling”
  • If Charlie Parker Was a Gunslinger,There'd Be a Whole Lot of Dead Copycats
    The Name of the Photographer is William Gedney #5
  • Movie Morlocks: TCM
    Jean Harlow, Mary Dees, and SARATOGA
  • davekehr.com
    Nobody home.
  • Thrilling Days of Yesteryear
    Holding pattern
  • DVD Savant (Glenn Erickson)
    Tuesday September 12, 2017
  • CulturePulp (Mike Russell)
    Detail
  • Criterion Reflections
    Z (1969) - #491
  • The Trailers From Hell! Blog
    By: anybunny.mobi/latest/
  • True Classics
    The Allan Fish Online Film Festival 2017: Allan ‘n’ Avery
  • Filmicability
    2013--The Year in Review
  • Press Play (IndieWire)
    Press Play Is Not Done Playing
  • The Girl with the White Parasol
    Movie Review: Hans Christian Andersen
  • Total Film News
    It's Statham vs. prehistoric shark in monster movie Meg
  • The Blue Vial
    '14
  • Edward Copeland on Film...and more
    I read the news today — oh boy
  • A Random Walk Through Film
    Fort Tilden - Q&A (SXSW)
  • Popcorn & Prejudice (The Seattle Times)
    Oscar countdown: 'Silver Linings Playbook'
  • The World's Best Films
    The Year of Beasts of the Southern Wild
  • Misfortune Cookie Blog
    Happy 100th, Paramount!
  • Like Anna Karina's Sweater
    Ich werde ein Berliner (Or: From Liberty to Victory)
  • Thirtyframesasecond
    World on a Wire (1973)
  • Village Voice | Films
  • Shannon on Demand
  • GreenCine Daily
  • Cinebeats
  • Multiglom
  • Movies on Demand
  • A Certain Cinema
  • Tom Carson (American Prospect)
  • Scanners (Jim Emerson)
  • Roger Ebert's Journal
  • The Film Stage
  • The House Next Door
  • They Shoot Pictures, Don't They? - The 1,000 Greatest Films
  • easyMovieMaking
  • MUBI: your online cinema, anytime, anywhere
  • They Shoot Pictures, Don't They?
  • TheFilmSchool Blog
  • IFC.com

Gallimaufry & salmagundi

  • Boing Boing
    Supreme Court rules Trump can be sentenced in hush money case
    8 hours ago
  • io9
    Star Wars: Ahsoka May Have Found Its New Baylan Skoll
    9 hours ago
  • John Scalzi (Whatever)
    Some Thoughts On “The Fire Inside”
    13 hours ago
  • Lawrence Person's Futuramen
    Library Additions: Two Signed Ray Bradbury Postcards
    19 hours ago
  • The Believer
    Exciting New Family Movie Releases to Enjoy Together in 2025
    1 day ago
  • Shakespeare Geek
    Wicked Shakespeare
    1 day ago
  • The Last Word On Nothing
    Oh Wow: An Exercise in Certainty
    2 days ago
  • Michael Swanwick
    CROWS AND SILENCES by Lucius Shepard
    1 week ago
  • Terribleminds
    Writer’s Resolution 2025: Change Your Story
    1 week ago
  • The Comic's Comic
    Episode #465: Comedy MVPs of 2024 with Jason Zinoman
    2 weeks ago
  • The Oatmeal - Comics, Quizzes, & Stories
    Rudolph with your nose so bright
    2 weeks ago
  • Paul Cornell
    The Death of Wolverine is Out Now!
    2 weeks ago
  • Genreality
    How Movie Buffs Can Benefit from Open-Access Online Viewing Options
    5 weeks ago
  • The Open Notebook
    Covering Science in the Context of Conflict
    1 month ago
  • Balloon Juice
    Jack Smith Brief Released (Mostly in Full, Names Redacted)!
    3 months ago
  • Neil Gaiman
    Little, Big
    3 months ago
  • The Rumpus.net
    Organic Sins: Clemens Meyer’s While We Were Dreaming
    1 year ago
  • Wil Wheaton
    the best laid plans
    1 year ago
  • Ptak Science Books
    Colossus in the Colosseum
    2 years ago
  • shattersnipe: malcontent & rainbows
    Twitter, Truth & Apologies
    2 years ago
  • Kay Kenyon
    How to title a novel
    2 years ago
  • You and Me, Dupree
    Wine 102
    2 years ago
  • The Hathor Legacy
    Lovense lush 2 review
    4 years ago
  • LAUGHSPIN
    Hello world!
    4 years ago
  • Making Light
    Low, dishonest decade
    5 years ago
  • dispositio
    Democracy is Heartless: A Plea
    5 years ago
  • Blogging Shakespeare
    Shakespeare and Quentin Tarantino
    5 years ago
  • Ta-Nehisi Coates : The Atlantic
    I’m Not Black, I’m Kanye
    6 years ago
  • Cosmos and Culture
    The True, The Real And The Beautiful: 7 Years Of 'Cosmos And Culture'
    6 years ago
  • Pharyngula
    Friday Cephalopod: I succumb to peer pressure and will mention Octopolis
    7 years ago
  • The Edge of the American West
    England Expects (note on Dunkirk)
    7 years ago
  • Mike Brotherton
    2016 Launch Pad Astronomy Workshop Participants
    8 years ago
  • Retort
    From the archives: Jeffrey Sachs: On climate, more ‘now’ and ‘how’ is needed
    10 years ago
  • Blag Hag
    The Jenome is no longer crashing & comments are working!
    10 years ago
  • Hyperbole and a Half
    Menace
    11 years ago
  • slatternly
    Female musicians, Noel Gallagher and the problem with dude listeners.
    11 years ago
  • My Blue Screen
    AN INVITATION TO MY NEW DIGS
    13 years ago
  • Seed Magazine
    Full Steam Ahead on CS-STEM
    13 years ago
  • How to be a Retronaut
  • Hayden Planetarium
  • mymodernmet
  • Occupy Publishing
  • Shakespeare’s England

Nick: "I'm a hero. I was shot twice in the Tribune."
Nora: "I read you were shot five times in the tabloids."
Nick: "It's not true. He didn't come anywhere near my tabloids."
— Myrna Loy and William Powell, The Thin Man


"I always dress appropriately and impeccably for all occasions. I would show you a snapshot of myself in a G-string, taken at Simm-La, with a flying wombat, dingo dog and a wily platypus." — Professor Posthlewhistle (W.C. Fields)

"Humor can get in under the door while seriousness is still fumbling at the handle." — G.K. Chesterton

Tags

1914 1922 1923 1924 1925 1926 1927 1928 1929 1931 1932 1936 1938 1939 1941 1942 1944 1946 1949 1951 1953 1954 1955 1956 1957 1958 1959 1960 1961 1962 1963 1964 1965 1966 1967 1968 1969 1970 1971 1972 1973 1974 1975 1979 1989 1994 2001: A Space Odyssey 2002 2005 2006 2008 2009 2010 2011 2012 A Separation Admiral Akira Kurosawa Al Pacino Alan Arkin Alan Young Alec Guinness Alfred Hitchcock Alice in Wonderland Alien Alki Beach Alloy Orchestra alt-universe movies Amy Adams Ana Torrent animation Anne Francis Another Earth Anthony Harvey Anthony Hopkins archaeology Arthur Conan Doyle astro Backbeat Basil Rathbone Beast From 20000 Fathoms Bedazzled Bernard Cribbins Bernard Herrmann Betty Boop Billy Wilder Blazing Saddles blogs Bollywood Boris Karloff Boulting Brothers Brad Pitt Bridesmaids Brit Marling Broadway Theatre Archive Brock Peters Bugs Bunny Buster Keaton Carl Reiner Cary Grant Cat on a Hot Tin Roof Catherine Deneuve Cecil B. DeMille Charles M. Schulz Charley Bowers Charlie Chaplin Christopher Lee Christopher Plummer Claudine Longet Cleavon Little Clint Eastwood Coen Brothers comics Criterion Daffy Duck Daleks Dana Andrews David Delamare Dennis Price Doctor Who documentaries Douglas Fairbanks Dr. Strangelove Dudley Moore Duncan Jones DVD Savant Ealing Studios Earth vs. The Flying Saucers Edith Piaf Elizabeth Elizabeth Taylor Emilio Aragón Eugene O'Neill Eva Green Ewan McGregor fan vids Fantastic Voyage film criticism film noir Film Preservation Blogathon Firefly-Serenity fleeting wisps of fame Folger Shakespeare Library food for your consideration Forbidden Planet Frances Farmer Françoise Arnoul Frankenstein Freaks friends Fritz Lang gangster movies Gene Tierney Gene Wilder George C. Scott George Pal Georges Méliès Glenn Erickson Gloria Swanson Godfrey Cambridge Graham Greene Greenwich Gregory Peck Groucho Guy Pearce H.G. Wells Hamlet Hammer Films Harlan Ellison Harold Lloyd Harper Lee heart surgery Hedy Lamarr history Hoffman Hollywood Hugo Humphrey Bogart I Love You Alice B. Toklas I'm All Right Jack Ian Carmichael IFC Improv Everywhere In Like Flint Intermission iPad It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown Jack Cardiff Jack Lemmon Jacques Tourneur James Bond James Cagney James Cameron James Coburn James Goldman James Mason Jane Merrow Jason Robards Jean Gabin Jean Harlow Jean Renoir Jeeves and Wooster Jimi Hendrix Joan Greenwood John Barry John Cameron Mitchell John Cusack John Lennon Johnny Depp Jon Stewart Joseph Cotten Julie Christie Julie Harris Junebug just so you know where I stand Kai Katharine Hepburn Kind Hearts and Coronets Laura Laurel and Hardy Lauren Bacall Lee Pace Leslie Nielsen life London Looney Tunes Lost Tribes of New York City Lotte Lenya Louis Armstrong Louise Brooks love and a bit with a dog Madeline Kahn Marilyn Monroe Mark Twain Martin Scorsese Marty Feldman Marx Brothers Mary Astor Mary Badham Max and Dave Fleischer Max Landis Superman Mel Brooks Metropolis Michael Bay Michael Curtiz Mickey Mouse Midnight in Paris Mike Cahill Miranda July Modern Times Monty Python movie art movie making my dad Myrna Loy New York Niall MacGinnis Nicolas Roeg Night of the Demon Norman Jewison not dead yet Octoberfilms One Day On Earth Orson Welles Oscars Our Man Flint Oxford P.G. Wodehouse Paper Birds Paris Qui Dort Paul Newman Paulette Goddard Peggy Cummins personal photos Peter Cook Peter Cushing Peter Lorre Peter O'Toole Peter Sellers Petulia Pic pick pie politics Portland Psycho quotes Raquel Welch Ray Bradbury Ray Harryhausen Ray Milland Raymond Massey remakes René Clair retro-futurism Richard Ayoade Richard Lester Richard Matheson Ringo Starr RIP Rob Brydon Robert Redford Robert Towne Robert Wise robots Rod Taylor Roger Corman's AIPoes Roger Ebert San Francisco Saul Bass scenes I love science science fiction science in fiction screw CGI Seattle Severn Darden Shakespeare Sherlock Holmes Shirley Maclaine Shortbus Sidney Lumet SIFF silent films silly walks Sinéad Cusack social commentary Some Like It Hot Soylent Green Star Trek Star Wars Stephen Colbert Stephen Tobolowsky Steve Coogan Stewart Stern struck me funny at the time Stuart Sutcliffe Submarine Sunset Blvd. superheroes Tarsem Singh TCM TEDTalk Tennessee Williams Terry Gilliam Tex Avery The Apartment The Artist The Beatles The Circus The Crawling Eye The Fall The Girls on Film The Godfather The Haunting The Iceman Cometh The Innocents The Lion in Winter The Magic Christian The Maltese Falcon The Man in the White Suit The Names of Love The New Yorker The Party The President's Analyst The Public Enemy The Roman Spring of Mrs. Stone The Russians Are Coming The Simpsons The Spirit of the Beehive The Tempest The Third Man The Time Machine The Tree of Life The Umbrellas of Cherbourg The Valley of Gwangi The War of the Worlds theater TheFilmSchool Theodore J. Flicker Things to Come thinking out loud Thomas Edison Tim Burton Timothy Dalton title sequences To Kill a Mockingbird Tod Browning Tom Waits Tony Curtis toons travel Troll Hunter TV Vertigo Víctor Erice Vincent Price vintage movies viral videos Viven Leigh Warren Beatty Wendy Ice When Worlds Collide William Cameron Menzies William Castle William Powell Woody Allen writing xkcd Yankee Doodle Dandy Zeppelin v. Pterodactyls
"Those are my principles, and if you don't like them ... well, I have others." — Groucho Marx

“Liar, liar, liar, liar, liar, liar / Truth is hard and tough as nails / That's why we need fairy tales.”
— from Munchhausen (1931) by Weimar Berlin cabaret composer Friedrich Hollaender

Search me
Simple theme. Powered by Blogger.